Relationships between men and women are intricate and amazing. God has given us great guidelines as to how we are to walk in male-female relationships in a way that they might sanctify us and glorify Him. I hope that this will help in creating a kind of 'How and Why' of opposite sex relationships.

. Honor your parents and his/her parents.

. Your justifiable needs must only be met with justifiable actions.

. You must be able to go to your Father in Heaven with your needs as a couple, interceding for one another separately and together.

Prayer together should be done on a daily basis. If you do not have the determination, diligence, or discipline to come together daily to seek Him for your potential life together as husband and wife, then it shows a lack of spiritual and relational commitment.

. When praying for your potential mate, do not be afraid to pray for him/her to gain the qualities that you are looking for in a mate. However, if the things that you are looking for in a mate are more material than spiritual or relational (say: how she looks or how he dresses) then you may desire to pray about a change in your own heart. It does not matter how she looks, for instance, but rather - it matters in how you feel about her and how you see her. She may never change her looks and he might not ever change his style, but God can change your heart, if you seek Him, to find her beautiful and him handsome.

. Make sure that you have Godly friends to speak into your life.

If you have Goldy parents, then their words are as gold above the silver of any other as they know you best and understand better the person you are and are maturing to become. If you lack righteous parents (and it seems that many parents are remiss or unwise in Holy Wisdom these days), then close friends who know you both are essential to hold you accountable to the Spirit of God. It is also great to seek out wise counsel from adults and clergy/elders who know the LORD and understand how to apply His wisdom into your life.

. Your heart's condition towards your potential mate is his or her security.

. If you are on the fence about a girl/guy and are unsure if you really want to continue courting, then it is best to fall on the safe side of the fence (which will always be on the other side from where she/he is.)

To continue courting a girl without clear direction from God as to where He is guiding you means that you are leading her astray and thus disrespecting the her and the LORD who guides everyone.

. Be the first to bow down in your relationship.

When in an argument, be the first one to lay down your right to be upset. When you are humble and penitent, you bring safety to the relationship because the other person sees that you are listening and attentive.

. Remember and Believe that your mate is on your side.

Even when discussions may get heated or things might not be working out right, take a second to breathe and respond to your potential mate with the knowledge that he/she is on your side and wants what is best for you. This may not match up with what you think is best for you, but you must always accept and appreciate his/her perspective and not become upset because it is not as you see it.

. Learn his/her love language and practice it daily. Be thoughtful about the justifiable needs of your potential mate and endeavor to meet those needs in his/her love language.

. Learn your love language and teach your potential mate to how to best show you love in the manner that you are most apt to receive it.

. If sex exists outside of the covenant commitment of marriage, then it unwittingly becomes a substitute.

. Save all intimacy for marriage. (learn how to play games and talk and enjoy each other's company without meeting their needs unjustifiably.)

. FOR THE GUYS

... Open doors for her - not just the physical ones.

... A woman is more emotionally oriented than a man.

There is nothing wrong with women as they are made. Some may have less control over others when it comes to emotion. However, contrary to most men's belief about women - a woman's feelings are often a very clear signal as to the reality of a situation and it also gives a man guidance in how to protect, honor, and serve his wife. Emotions are not stupid or the whinings of women - they are a plea for security and help.

. FOR THE GIRLS

... A man is more physically oriented than a woman.

... Learn to love and approve of who God has made you to be before a silver tongued man comes and tells you all that you want to believe about yourself.

... RIGHT RELATIONSHIP REFLECTIONS

What should a good relationship look like?

. Both of you will become brighter (there will be no shame/lying/guilt/fear) & (there will be an increase of service to others and each other/ there will be a more open dialogue of feelings and desires/ there will be a concious desire to be forthright to others and God)

. Your relationship with your potential mate's parents continually improves. (greater honor, respect, openess about your relationship with their daughter/son, honesty, reception to their guidance, and blessings for them)

. Your relationship with other people (especially belivers) becomes brighter and stronger.

. You learn to glorify God in all that you do as you are continually sanctified through your relationship and become more like Christ.